3 Simple Things to Say to Your Kids to Teach Forgiveness

It’s unavoidable, your kids will experience things in life that will cause pain and will require forgiveness. In fact, since we are all sinners, they will do plenty of hurting towards others as well. But, a child’s understanding of the importance of forgiveness is a critical relationship skill that will help them in the future. 

In fact, this is so important that God even commands us to forgive. Colossians 3:13 says, “…bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”

One of the best ways we can teach our children anything in life is through modeling. So, what better way to teach our kids about forgiveness than showing them the process of asking for forgiveness ourselves! As parents, we’ve all had times when we need to ask our kids for forgiveness. We lose our patience — usually over simple things at the most inopportune times — and we say something we immediately regret. Rather than brushing it under the rug, stop and use this as a teachable moment to show them how no one is perfect, we all make mistakes, and we need to humbly ask for forgiveness.

Here are three very simple things you can say to your kids to help teach them about the act of forgiveness:

  1. “I’m sorry for…”
    Rather than a simple, “I’m sorry,” take it a step further and name exactly what you did that you are sorry for and recognize their feelings. This will help your child learn to identify actions and consequences. “I’m sorry for yelling at you for losing your shoes. I shouldn’t have done that, and I can see that it made you sad.”
  2. “Will you please forgive me?”
    Get down to their level, look them straight in the eye and genuinely ask for their forgiveness. Saying sorry shows regret for what we did wrong, but asking for forgiveness gives the other person a chance to take action as well. There is humility in the simple question, “Will you please forgive me?”
  3. “Let’s start over!”
    After they agree to forgive you, give them a hug, thank them and enthusiastically say, “Let’s start over.” These three words work wonders — give it a try! Rewind time about 30 seconds and recreate the moment again. 

These three simple sayings are powerful for children to hear, especially from an adult. We must teach them that it takes leaning into God’s strength to forgive others, even when it’s hard. If we don’t forgive others, we will feel weighed down by our unforgiving attitude — and that’s not a fun way to live!

For a visual representation of forgiveness, check out this Bible2School At Home Resource that uses a brick to show the heaviness of an unforgiving attitude. 

Looking for more ideas for your kids? Check out this blog, Encouraging Our Kids to Forgive Others Even When It’s Hard or listen to this 5-minute podcast episode, “Do I really have to forgive everyone?”

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